Like a Sermon from a Pastor

One time, I was talking to a woman. She knows a lot about me, you know, my extra-marital affairs… It was like I was listening to a sermon from a fucking pastor. Here’s what she had to say:

“Reality is, there will always be temptations wherever you go. You can’t escape that. You know that for sure. So my piece of advice, when there’s temptation right in front of you, I want you to be strong. Always be professional. Even if the girl is tempting you, whether explicitly or implicitly, you have to say no always. Say no at all times especially when you’re inside the office. Even if you’re outside the office, and when the one who’s tempting you is your colleague, you have to say no at all times. Even if the girl is not tempting you, don’t you ever make a move that would make her fall for your smooth moves.”

“If you can’t be faithful with your wife. Just tell her. There’s no need to hide your secret sexual affairs. Just confess and be ready that she will leave you. Don’t let us suffer in the dark. Suffering could be more painful if we always have fears that you’re lying in front of us. Suffering could be worse if our fears are proven true all along. We, women, are faithful by nature. So if men can’t level with that, it’s better to part ways. You see, I can stand on my own. I don’t need a husband who can not fuck me when I wanted to. But if he’s the one who wants to fuck, I can’t refuse because he would be upset. But if I’m the one who wants to fuck, he got a lot of excuses of his inability. For all I know, he has already cummed on his other woman. Is that true on your end, Mike?”

All I could reply, “I don’t like this kind of talk.”

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